It was a typical Summer. I met many girls. Most of them didn’t like me, and a few were smart enough to look at me and think, “yeah, that dude is a good idea.” But two girls in particular will always stand out the most from this Summer. When I met them, we got along, but it wouldn’t have been a good idea to bone down on either of them. There were prominent cultural forces conspiring against us, so I held back. It’s best not to get physical with a girl unless you believe beyond a reasonable doubt that her life would be better with your dick in it.
But instead of following my routine of not talking to them again, I created a sub-routine: I went out of my way to call them and hang out. In short, I made them my friends.
I always thought that a platonic male-female friendship was necessarily strained. Either the guy was secretly trying to get in the girl’s pants or vice versa. Though this scenario is common, it isn’t inevitable. The solution to this, the beta male’s burden, is what I call the psychological strip club principle. It’s the true purpose of a female friend.
When a guy goes to a strip club, it’s to surround himself with beauty. It’s not necessarily sexual, and if you get boners in a strip club, that means you’re lonely. Strippers are fun, and even though you know you’re not going to get laid, being around tits and ass makes you feel better. It’s like how sex is one of the best hangover cures. Female sexuality is an irreplaceable stimulant for your mind as well as your body.
Likewise, when you hang out with a female friend properly, it’s like going to a strip club if your brain was your dick. Done right, there’s no question about who is masculine and who is feminine in the interaction. Everything from the jokes, to the banter, to the touching indicates that this is a man and woman interacting. If you don’t teaser her, hold her hand, roll your eyes when she complains, and snap her bra, you’re doing it wrong.
It feels good for her to be around a man, and it feels good for you to be around a woman. You don’t have to have your dick in her snatch to give or receive value from each other. It’s gay to say that out loud, but it’s true.
From the outside looking in, the interaction seems like a good date, and it feels like a good date for you, but that’s not what it is. Subconsciously, a female friend is a reminder that you don’t have to fuck every single girl just because she’s in dick range.
The proper dynamic of a male-female friendship isn’t automatic, so keep these three rules in mind to ensure a good relationship with your female friend.
1. You be the one to make her your friend.
It’s obvious when a girl isn’t going to be a good situation for you, so call it out. Too often, a guy will meet a girl and make a few mistakes with her, then slowly but surely try to get in her pants. When this never works, the girl gives the guy the “let’s just be friends” talk. What’s weird is when a girl says she just wants to be friends with you, she doesn’t even want to be friends with you. You were being covertly dishonest for the entire relationship, so she’s not sure who you are, and you cannot be trusted, even on a friendship level. You’re more likely to be a potential rapist in her mind than a potential friend.
2. Don’t use your female friend as a pimp.
If your female friend wants to set you up with one of her friends, that’s fine I suppose, but don’t expect it, and definitely don’t ask for it. You need to be responsible for getting laid all on your own. This skill is as important as having a purpose when it comes to being a man. Besides, when a friend does try to hook you up with a girl, it’s difficult for you to look awesome. The whole “he’s a good guy, I’d love to find a good girl for him” context is extremely damaging. Girls read this as “he’s a huge pussy who couldn’t get laid to save his dick.”
3. A female friend is not an approval sticker.
Guys do this thing where they try to be seen in public with girls so other girls won’t think they’re creepy dudes. This emotional narcissism is a burden on your friend, and you come off as a little boy hanging around mommy to get by in the world. In short, this makes you dead weight. Your female friend won’t tell you this because girls hate confrontation, so I’m telling you this.
As men, it’s easy to let our inner reptile take over and devour every girl that comes in our territory. This intense focus tends to dehumanize girls, but more importantly, it doesn’t make life much fun. A female friend teaches you to appreciate girl as girl, not just girl as vagina. And hey, you never know—you might totally bang her one day.